I like to consider myself to be an explorer. Someone who's spontaneous, is full of life and takes risks. But when I sit with myself and ask this question, what is my honest answer?
I know you see people post pictures and quotes about finding themselves when they explore - you know that soul nurturing stuff that everyone talks about? For me, its not about sitting in a beautiful place, it's the journey that goes along with it.
I went on a hike yesterday..a long ass hike that had me on the trail for almost 12 hours. I'm not much of a talker when I hike (mainly because I struggle to find my own breathe during cardio) so it's really a time for me to sit with myself and process a lot of my thoughts and feelings. I always have been moved by the question. It's usually been a motivator for me to take the leap and see the world - but when has it really challenged me in my everyday life?
As I've started the transition into a new lifestyle over the last year I've grown in a lot of aspects but now that I'm not travelling around how do I keep this always expanding mentality up?
Full disclosure: it's been tough.
To start, I think it's hard enough to feel like you're getting life right. I find it really funny when people reach out and say they're so proud of the changes I've made and how successful I've become. I laugh. I struggle with my day to day more that anyone knows. I deal with relationship and communication struggles. I battle a war everyday with body dysmorphia. I literally question every.single.thing. that I do and always think that I'm getting it wrong.
Isn't it funny how we envy other people?...
ANYWAYS going back to this hike I was on yesterday. 12 long hours. Just me and my chaotic brain - and it just clicked. When was the last time I challenged myself and did something that scared me? Something that pushed physical or mental barriers? Something I that I knew might very well crash and burn, but something I at least I could go to bed at night saying I gave it a damn try..and know I tried my best. When was the last time I stood up for myself? When was the last time I tried to love someone or let someone love me?
Why have I just stopped trying to LIVE?
I spend so many of my nights staring at my ceiling before falling asleep and the most consistent questions is Why? What If? In the end, it all comes down to action or inaction - and most of the time, we just sit there.
So I challenge you to really sit with yourself today and ask yourself that very same question:
When Was The Last Time You Did Something For The First Time?